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Monday, May 7, 2007

the groovy black and white man


"The Black And White Man was an ethnic superhero based in Bronx, New York. Like most superheroes he was concerned about regular crime but, much like his tutor Luke Cage, B&W Man had a special fondness for fighting racist organizations.


"The Black And White Man was born in Tupelo, Mississippi, under odd circumstances. His mother was a KKK white supremacist while his father was a Black Panther black supremacist. With such hatred involved in his deep-drunken conception, instead of being born a mulatto his genes split by the two sides of his body, making him literally half black and half white. This weird configuration is considered to be the source of his powers, one side concentrating the gifts of blackness and the other the flaws of whiteness (original titles from the California Liberal Institute for Mutants). Another point of notice is that his brain lacks a corpus callosum, vis a vis the two sides of his brain are not connected, leading to a double personality. These physical quirks and his predictable family issues - his parents broke up when he was aged 15 minutes (counted from conception) and he was raised in an orphanage - lead to a very unusual personal life, being him the only person known to have been both a Quantum Physics PhD and a high school dropout. In other words, the white side, the one who was expelled from high school, was hopelessly dumb, scoring an I.Q. of 76, while the black side was a genius with an I.Q. of 189. According to research conducted by Professor X this has nothing to do with the genetic quality of either of his parents, both of whom were very stupid (I can't believe you've thought one side was dumb because of being black or white, you racist prick!). The theory is that Blacky took the left, or "rational" side of the brain, while Whitey was installed on the right, 'impulsive' side."




1 comments:

NeedABrain said...

Judging from your links and posts, I deduce you are a conservative black man and by this I'm happy in finding my desired public, capable to understand the exact satirical value and deeper meaning of this modest piece of humor. Thank you very much.

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